The
Seven Basic Needs Of A Woman
Any husband can make himself irresistible to his wife by learning
to meet her seven basic marital needs.
1. Her need for a spiritual leader.
He is a man of courage, conviction, commitment, compassion, and
character. He takes the initiative in cultivating a spiritual
environment for the family. He becomes a capable and competent
student of God's Word and lives out before all a life founded
on the Word of God. He leads his wife in becoming a woman of God
and he takes the lead in training the children in the things of
the Lord.
(Psalm 1, Ephesians 5:23-27)
2. Her need to personal affirmation/appreciation.
He praises her for personal attributes and qualities. He extols
her virtues as a wife, mother, and homemaker. He openly commends
her in the presence of others as a marvelous mate, friend, lover
and companion. She feels that to him, no one is more important
in this world.
(Proverbs 31:28-29, Song of Solomon 4:1-7, 6:4-9, 7:1-9)
3. Her need for personal affection and romance.
He showers her with timely and generous displays of affection.
He also tells her how much he cares for her with a steadfast flow
of words, cards, flowers, gifts and common courtesies.
Remember: Affection is the environment in which sexual union is
enjoyed and a wonderful marriage developed
(Song of Solomon 6:10, 13, Ephesians 5:28-29,33)
4. Her need for intimate conversation.
He talks with her at the feeling level (heart to heart). He listens
to her thoughts (i.e. her heart) about the events of her day with
sensitivity, interest, and concern. Conversations with her convey
a desire to understand her, not to change her
(Song of Solomon 2:8-14, 8:13-14, I Peter 3:7)
5. Her need for honesty and openness.
He looks into her eyes and, in love, tells her what he really
thinks (Ephesians 4:15). He explains his plans and actions clearly
and completely because he regards himself as responsible for her.
He wants her to trust him and feel secure. (Proverbs 15:22-23)
6. Her need for home support and stability.
He firmly shoulders the responsibility to house, feed and clothe
the family. He provides and protects and he does not feel sorry
for himself when things get tough. Instead he looks for concrete
ways to improve home life. He desires to raise their marriage
and family to a safer and more fulfilling level.
Remember: The husband/father is the security hub of the family
(I Timothy 5:8)
7. Her need for family commitment.
He puts his family first. He commits his time and energy to
the spiritual, moral and intellectual development of the children.
For example, he prays with them (especially at night by the bedside),
he reads to them, he engages in sports with them and takes them
on other outings. He does not play the fool's game of working
long hours, trying to get ahead, while children and spouse languish
in neglect.
(Ephesians 6:4, Colossians 3:19-20)
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